Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I love how my cats smell like pot.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
