she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
Randomize