I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Randomize
