so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
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