ADVERTISEMENT

• (206): View more from Washington

  I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.

  Fav 64 1780 6050

  share tweet
  

• (718): View more from New York

  i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..

  Fav 11 3879 1446

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (307): View more from Wyoming

  We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy

  Fav 4 1186 2912

  share tweet
  

• (815): View more from Illinois

  u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club

  Fav 12 2852 1361

  share tweet
  
• 

  23 Parents Gave Awful Advice about “The Birds and the Bees”

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (248): View more from Michigan

  guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?

  Fav 22 6560 1391

  share tweet
  

• (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  Why are you speaking in third person?

  (1-902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.

  Fav 5 3624 1108

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.

  Fav 6 1781 1450

  share tweet
  

• (914): View more from New York

  I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.

  Fav 3 1391 879

  share tweet
  

• (516): View more from New York

  I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much

  Fav 1 1458 793

  share tweet
  
• 

  These 19 Deaths Are Ironically Hilarious

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (614): View more from Ohio

  Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?

  Fav 9 820 1692

  share tweet
  

• (859): View more from Kentucky

  The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow

  Fav 5 2188 828

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (307): View more from Wyoming

  Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.

  Fav 4 1406 646

  share tweet
  

• (631): View more from New York

  I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever

  Fav 22 3587 888

  share tweet
  

• (660): View more from Missouri

  Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!

  Fav 4 1174 603

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (423): View more from Tennessee

  He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!

  Fav 2 874 525

  share tweet
  

Randomize