Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
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