party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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