I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
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