I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
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