Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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