seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
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