Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
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