I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
