Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
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I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
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But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Some dudes just stopped and stared at me peeing in the street for like 5mins, and I yelled HEY. HEY. WANT ME TO SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH? I'LL SHIT ON YOUR CHEST FOR FIVE DOLLARS, PAPI
this is why i love drunk you
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
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