drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
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