She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
25 People Admit the Worst Things They’ve Done for Good Reasons
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
25 Things All Men Can Definitely Agree On
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off