you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
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