You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
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