i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
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