i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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