So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
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