Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
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