She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
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