he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
