Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Randomize