Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize