I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
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