I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Randomize
