Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
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