Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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