people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize