My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
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