would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
