shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
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