You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Randomize
