I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
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