I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
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He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
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Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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