This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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