New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize