Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
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