You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
NoShamevember. You game?
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Randomize
