I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
