I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
