i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
Randomize