adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize