dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Randomize
