Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
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At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
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I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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