I wanna bring you to show and tell
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
