every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
