i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
that is very illegal...i love you.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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