So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Randomize
